A Balance of Sorts - Thaipusam 2012

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Rubbish and filth occupied almost every square inch of the ground. Drink packets and candy wrappers, water bottles and discarded bits of food. There was no overbearing smell or stench and maybe this made it easier for people to carry on with their businesses. You’d be surprised if I told you that this scene took place in a place of worship, an iconic Hindu temple, a place that was renowned to Hindus – some local, some from far and wide. This was Batu Caves on game day.

An estimated 1.5million people took part in this year’s Thaipusam celebration at Batu Caves, not all necessarily Hindus. This popular festival has the magnetism needed to pull foreigners from all corners of the globe. Some come for the photo opportunity, some to be immersed in a small part of a mighty religion and some come for the carnival type atmosphere.

The locals on the other hand are all too used to this sacrificial festival. Non Hindus appreciate the public holiday and steer clear of roads heading in the direction of the caves while some Hindus choose to brave the traffic, crowds and weather for a glimpse of something spectacular.

I, myself have only been a spectator at Thaipusam. I’m afraid I’m not as spiritually inclined to possess the mental clarity to perform such an act of sacrifice. The thought of shaving my head can send a shiver so deep down my spine it would leave a trail of icicles. The idea of vegetarianism commands a strength I may never discover and the mental stamina to focus on a noble intent, to manifest clean and pure thoughts is something I humbly accept defeat almost everyday. I still cuss at the slow driver in front of me, who theoretically is doing me a favour by keeping me within the speed limit. My excuse – “To err, is human after all”.

And yet for the past three years at Thaipusam in Batu Caves, I stand in awe of little children, with the determination to rise above it all, families who obviously stay together because they pray together. I see a sea of selflessness and devotion, and it resonates so strongly within me that I am drawn to these people.

But with the good, come the not so good. Thaipusam brings people of all walks of life together. For one day, I stand within a crowd and try to embrace the good with the sometimes ugly.

At the foot of the entrance to this holy place, broken beer bottles line the littered streets. Cigarette butts complete the artwork on the ground, showcasing that hours ago, this party right here was raging. It’s disappointing in a way that stirs a ferocious anger that is ironically so easily put out with a healthy serve of reality.

Teenage boys huddled in groups and wolf whistled at girls. Typical scene at any funfair, only this isn’t a funfair. They take it a few steps too far and cop a feel when people are pushed against one another, all patiently waiting to climb 252 stairs to see God. This was the first year I let every single idiot who groped me go. I simply took a step back and moved out of reach. There was no point being consumed with anger, especially when there was so much love and devotion present.

I didn’t mind the crowds, and I certainly didn’t mind the heat but what I did mind was the attitudes present that day. Devotees pushed and shoved, elbowed me countless times as we all made the exact same journey to the top. In my mind it defeated the purpose to want to make this sacrifice in God’s name and then intentionally step on every person’s toes you could to make sure you reached the top of the stairs. How come we didn’t want to help one another, or let our patience be tested? How could you be consumed with selfishness when the day itself stood for purity?

I saw people cussing in the temple, people smoking, people littering, people wearing shoes in the temple, people trampling over old ladies, people spitting, people just being mean.

The littering must have got to me the most. No one would dare litter so openly in a temple on a normal day, but being surrounded by over a million people allowed for mob mentality to govern consciences. Parents littered right on the stairs in front of their kids, creating hindrances for everyone else going up.

My heart broke a little but for every selfish act, there was almost an equal and positive reaction. I also saw people helping one another, people sharing water, people letting others pass through, people making friends along the way and somehow the balance in my reality seemed restored.

I wish everyone could take an extra minute to think about what this celebration really stands for before making it about themselves. Seeing the good in one another is infectious, it’s made me rethink some trivial but important small steps I can make today to consciously change for the good. I just hope being bad isn’t as equally infectious.